


newfound warmth

by sufferingsoprano



Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series)
Genre: Crushes, Deceit Sanders Angst, Deceit Sanders-centric, Denial of Feelings, Falling In Love, Family, Feelings, Fluff, Friendship, Good Deceit Sanders, Insecure Creativity | Roman "Princey" Sanders, Lies, M/M, Morality | Patton Sanders is a Good Friend, Morality | Patton Sanders is a Sweetheart, Morally Neutral Deceit Sanders, Sympathetic Deceit Sanders, Warm and Fuzzy Feelings
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-07
Updated: 2020-05-07
Packaged: 2021-03-02 19:14:07
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 827
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24051910
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sufferingsoprano/pseuds/sufferingsoprano
Summary: [takes place after the events of “selflessness v. selfishness redux”]————Following the chaotic aftermath of Lee & Mary Lee’s wedding, Janus finds himself more hopeful than ever for acceptance amongst the other sides.And begrudgingly, he also begins to realize and come to terms with his newfound feelings for one of his fellow sides.————a Deceit-centric Drabble,with the ship of focus being Patton x Janus
Relationships: Creativity | Roman "Princey" Sanders & Deceit Sanders, Morality | Patton Sanders & Deceit Sanders, Morality | Patton Sanders/Deceit Sanders
Kudos: 85





	newfound warmth

**Author's Note:**

> lmao I wrote the draft for this during the online ap exam demo where they basically said write whatever you want— so perhaps someone on the collegeboard has read the first draft to this short Drabble, which I think is a complete power move on my part ngl!  
> but aye enjoy :)

As Janus sunk down once again, he felt an uncharacteristically warm, fuzzy feeling in his chest.  
It was an abnormal sensation to say the least— or should he just return to his usual facade and regard it as nothing out of the ordinary?  
Sighing, he decided that that was a question for another day and hopefully a far less strenuous day at that.  
Bringing his gloved hand to his chest, he breathed deeply for the first time since taking his leave from Thomas’s basement.  
The day had been quite eventful, even a little unsettling at times, but in the end, many problems were solved, whilst a few new ones were created. He supposed that was how most of Thomas’s emotional escapades tended to go, and that in time, the cycle would simply continue on as these new problems would get solved, and once again, new problems would emerge.  
Nonetheless, Janus hoped to regain his composure; considering the fact that he personally had left the situation on somewhat of a high note.  
However, an unsettling feeling remained within him as his stomach seemed to twist and turn, practically doing summersaults.

He so desperately wanted to ignore it, for it would be far easier to just lie to himself— just as easily as he often lied to others.

but this feeling was different.  
Though frightening and new— it was almost exhilarating.  
And for some odd reason, the exhilaration was a phenomenon which Janus seemed to want to bathe himself in.  
Though he knew casting aside the strange emotions could make things simpler, he could not bring himself to do so, for the twist in his stomach felt awfully nice despite its peculiarity.

Janus huffed and smiled to himself, still baffled that Thomas had accepted him.  
For once he didn’t have to be the villain to have his voice heard. He was just another member of the team trying to pitch in to help Thomas.

Janus even considered the idea that perhaps he could eventually become a member of the tight knit family Thomas and the others had created together.

But then again, how could he not recall the sneer in Roman’s voice upon learning of Janus’s true name? The hatred and scrutiny in the fanciful side’s eyes as he gave his last glance toward Janus was not something the deceitful side would be able to forget. And he knew, to some extent, he deserved it. He knew the weight of his backhanded comment when he made it, as after being humiliated in his own moment of vulnerability he had wanted to bring the same discomfort upon Roman. He regretted it now, seeing as it only deepened Roman’s distaste and distrust in him. Not to mention the fact that by digging at Roman’s insecurities, he’d thrown Remus, someone who always stood by him, under the bus. He hadn’t been thinking clearly when he’d spoken, but it pained him to think that perhaps his words had also led Remus to distrust him as well.  
Janus knew very well that as the literal embodiment of deceit, he wasn’t to be viewed as the most “honest” of the sides, but even despite that fact, the accusatory glances sent his way still felt like a punch in the gut. It was just another reminder that he was still an outsider, an outcast, and just as unwelcome in the family as he’d always been.  
It stung far more than he’d care to admit.

But then, there was Patton.  
Soft, sweet, trusting Patton…  
the most kindest being Deceit had ever encountered, but nonetheless one of the most troubled.  
Janus hated the fact that Patton so often subjected himself to silent suffering, as the mere thought of Patton feeling worthless and alone in the universe made Janus sick to his stomach in the most unpleasant of ways.  
Yet despite the emotional rollercoaster Patton embarked on during the day’s bustle, Patton had still taken the time to smile ever so gently at none other than the lying, cold, calculating embodiment of deceit, himself.

As good as acceptance from the whole group could feel, he knew for a fact that it could not compare to the sensation of Patton’s warm smile directed his way.  
The tenderness in Patton’s eye and the slight quiver of his lips whilst speaking to him left Janus in a state of bewilderment.  
He could not get the other side out of his thoughts.

And though he would never say it aloud, Deceit decided that there was no use lying to himself, for there really was no mystery behind why his insides seemed to tumble with delight.  
He knew with clarity that Patton was the true cause of the newfound warmth in his usually cold blood.

And though the snake of a man had zero clue of what to do with these newly acquired feelings, he felt a certain contentment in his heart, and perhaps an inkling of excitement for what the future could hold.


End file.
